The Zeitgeist Diaries Pt. 2 - Redundancy
By: Javan Bair
It wouldn’t be a used truck
dealership if there weren’t a steel sign with the company logo in front of the
office. In big, brushed metal letters fixed inside of a banner, the company name
TTI Trucks is the very first thing you see when you walk inside.
Like most companies, we place our
logo anywhere and everywhere we possibly can. The logo is everywhere you look. Our
hats, t-shirts, license plates, trucks, and coffee cups. Everything has a logo
on it. For Christ’s sake, I can’t tell you how many times I have been cut off
by a truck with TTI mudflaps on my way to work.
So after about a month of working
there and seeing this logo on every square foot of my workspace, I realized
something. I have no clue what the “TTI” in “TTI Trucks” stands for. I ask Mike
what it means, and he tells me he has no clue. He has worked here for five
years, and that strikes me as odd. So, I ask around, and no one seems to know.
Until I asked Angie, the girl who did our payroll, for a document with our
entire company name printed.
And there it was. In all of its repetitive
glory, “Turner Trucks Incorporated Trucks.” “Wow. The word “trucks” is in our
company name twice. Let there be no confusion that we sell trucks and truck
parts. The redundancy makes it undoubtedly funny. (Redundancy: the inclusion of
extra components which are not strictly necessary to functioning in case of
failure in other components.) The overuse of the word trucks in the company is accurately
redundant as it neither aids nor diminishes anything from a money-making standpoint.
But it did make for a name that rolls off the tongue nicely. Nicely enough for
me to begin answering the phone at the parts desk like “Turner Trucks
Incorporated Trucks. This is Trucks. How can I help you find Trucks?”
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We even had cloth masks made with
our secretly redundant logos on them. I’m not sure why we had those made. We wore them one time.
Quite literally one time that I can remember. And you would have thought that
some of my coworkers were channeling the spirit of Rosa Parks, the way they
were fiercely preaching about overcoming oppression and the need for more civil
liberties and rights. But unlike Rosa Parks, who was fighting for freedom while
living through the brutal realities of racism and forced segregation. These
were grown-ass, blue-collar men falling to pieces behind a small piece of cloth.
I am not saying there is no
validity to the argument over the infringement of masks on the principles of
freedom. But at the time, placing the fabric on our mouths to potentially stop
old people from dying seemed quite minimal compared to the state of other things
in America. We had the two oldest and least qualified potential candidates
vying for the most important job in the world during a key moment in our nation’s
history. The streets of most major cities were still riddled with palpable
tensions between citizens and police officers. Protests were erupting
everywhere, all the time, and about anything. Violent crime had risen significantly
since the pandemic began. Drug overdoses were skyrocketing. The masks just seemed
a bit redundant in comparison. And despite everything that happened, the “goddamn,
pussy, libtard, queer masks” remained a central point of contention.
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If I had to give an estimate, I
would say that Gus weighed approximately seven-thousand pounds. He was a morbidly
obese cokehead, which I thought was impossible before meeting him. He was a
co-worker of mine during this period. He sold used parts at the counter next to
Mike. And this dude got COVID so fucking bad that it nearly killed him. He miraculously
pulled through and survived. He will be on oxygen for the rest of his life, but
that’s incredible considering a virus that targets the cardiovascular system specifically
was thwarted by a heart filled to the brim with cholesterol from numerous years
of deep-fried tamales and eight balls. Oh, and all the doctors and medicine,
which he thinks are liberal propaganda.
He was a full-blown disciple of Qanon,
Breitbart, Infowars, and any other conspiracy-driven narrative. He was, therefore,
not allowed to admit that COVID was real even after it put him in the hospital
for a complete month. He took one round of the vaccine and then read an article
that Bill Gates was using it to put microchips inside of people and just never
went back for a second dose. We would argue incessantly about politics and COVID
over the soft whispering sound from his oxygen tank as it released pressure.
That little *psst* sound would serve as a constant reminder that he really did
have COVID and it could potentially be life-threatening to high-risk (the old
and severely out of shape). If I ever brought this up to him, I was given the
same response. “Fuck you” *psst* “You stupid ass” *psst* “Democrat!” *psst* It
was like arguing with a walkie-talkie. He would then angrily grab his little oxygen
tank and waddle away until I could no longer hear the faint sound of me winning
another argument. *psst*
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All at once, in a large sweeping fashion.
Everyone and their grandmothers got COVID at TTI. After Gus, the dominos just continued
to fall. Somehow, during my part-time hours spent at work, I never contracted
COVID.
It was just me and another guy, Thomas,
who didn’t get COVID. I assume the variants that I was exposed to only affected
full-time employees, and Thomas did not get it because he works alone in the far
corner of our lot in the back of an old FED Ex truck. But that is a whole
different story for a whole different time.
For weeks I would come into work,
and there would be three people out of the usual thirty working there. But business
did not slow down. Not for one second. I have never been so happy to be a
part-time employee anywhere in my life. There would be a sea of angry customers
wondering where their truck parts were, and I would just look at the clock and realize,
“Oh, look at that! Time for class!” And I would leave and go to school, where I
would wear one of the custom cloth TTI masks and spend the rest of my afternoon
on what felt like the other side of the planet.
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I stand by my defense of college.
It is not (usually) a socialist brainwashing seminar like Fox News and The
Daily Wire would like you to believe. In fact, all those anchors and reporters
that consistently shit on institutions of higher education all went to one.
They wouldn’t have their jobs if they didn’t. When Ben Shapiro drones on about
the alleged brainwashing occurring at colleges across the nation, never forget that
he himself is a graduate of Harvard and UCLA. However, there are times that colleges
live up to the types of stereotypes that give reporters like Tucker Carlson wet
dreams. This was never more evident than when classes were reopened in the fall
of 2020.
CU reopened its doors with a no
negotiation, one-hundred percent mask mandate, and a very limited number of
in-person courses.
The mandate itself was little to no
issue to me. Much like the escape from the mundane nature of the pandemic that
I was receiving by working at TTI, the school re-opening served as a similar
reminder of regular life. So, if all I had to do was wear a mask to attend
classes, then so be it.
But Jesus H Christ did these young
students who had never had any taste of power and got totally shitfaced on the
role of enforcing the mandates on others who did not comply. And, of course
they did. Most of these young people were consuming media that reinforced the
idea that those unwilling to comply with mask mandates were synonymous with the
mob of Qanon dipshits trying to rip down 5G towers. While it is true that those
people do often stay in the same camp, they don’t usually share the same tent.
These misguided liberal children of conservative parents thought they were
playing an important role in saving humanity while pissing their Dads off. It
was a perfect situation for misguided post-teenage angst. Unfortunately for
them, they were just as annoying and as pedantic as the anti-maskers screaming
about their religious and constitutional rights to abstain from masks. As they
attempted to mock and berate their right-wing opponents, they became the very cannon
fodder needed to fill the b roll footage spots on Fox News. The pro-mask
policing student bodies on campuses all over the nation were just as terrible
as the deranged alt-right religious fanatic shouting at members of their town hall
representatives about their local mask mandates. “You cannot force me to cover
my mouth. God intended our mouths to be free from sinful oppression. God gave
me this hole to breathe from. God gave me this hole, and you cannot control it!
That’s God’s Hole!” That’s not a direct
quote, but we’ve all seen the videos at this point, and I'm not that far off.
Admittedly though, the return to in-person
classes felt somber. Most of the campus was closed, aside from a couple of
different buildings. Sure we had human contact in the realm of education once
more, but this felt like human contact Lite. Sure, being around the presence of
enough masked faces could make you feel alive again, but it’s just not the same
as the full-strength stuff. No one spoke to anyone else in the halls or classrooms.
It was just bleak. Everything felt gray. If it weren’t for the complete and
total abandonment of the mask mandates at TTI, I probably would have been
begging strangers to cough into my open mouth so I could feel alive again.
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“The masks are an
infringement on my fucking rights!” I was often yelled at by coworkers that looked
like deer in the headlights if you mentioned the Patriot Act.
“The masks are not a fucking option!
If you don’t comply, you are murdering people!” I would often hear similar
sentiments being screamed by students who were ironically obsessed with preserving our democracy.
The argument about masks has never
been over freedom v. oppression. It has always been about ability v.
regulation. And that is the real degree of freedom that we have in this country.
We do not, nor have we ever lived in a place with true freedom or unlimited liberties.
In America, you have the ability to do what you want until it no longer adheres
to an existing regulation. No matter where your allegiance was sworn at this
time, you were still not allowed to enter a restaurant and eat food without a
mask on. Stop pretending that you are somehow living in a free country. That is
a fever dream. We live and operate according to the freedoms allocated to us.
And if I have to wear a mask to go
to a brewery and sit inside like a civilized human instead of sitting at a
picnic table in the middle of a closed-down street in December like some kind
of side character in Grand Theft Auto, then so be it.
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Much like the name Turner Trucks Inc.
Trucks, there is a comically valuable level of redundancy in the arguments
presented in this piece. The battle that was waged between the hardcore pro and
anti-maskers was relevant in terms of their place in time but absolutely
fucking useless in terms of assisting our country as it navigated a pandemic. These
two groups of people made a massively absurd amount of noise, but they achieved
nothing. They were extra components unnecessary to the functionality of our
nation. These folks were merely cheerleaders for ideals that were not even their
own.
And at the end of it, both
approaches appeared useless. Shortly after everyone at TTI contracted COVID, CU
Denver canceled all classes for the next semester and a half because many of our masked student population had also
gotten COVID. Looking back, is it fair to admit we had no fucking idea how to resolve
the pandemic? It seems that we were simply adding more and more redundant parts to the machine rather
than addressing the central cause of all of our problems, an already broken two-party
system.
***Pt. 3 Coming Next Week***
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